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Give us your tired, your poor, your huddled masses...
Four score and seven years ago, our fathers brought forth
on this continent, a new nation, conceived in liberty...
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men
are created equal...
Hmm....
Alright, you got me, we still don't actually have a manifesto per se... yet. I just thought
perhaps some of these inspirational speeches might get me in the mood to whip one up really quick.
Since we don't have an official manifesto at the moment I will do my best to put into words the idea
behind this website, and the goal of what we hope to accomplish.
The original concept behind the Rat Lab was to provide a haven from the ever-expanding commerce driven
blob of drudgery that is devouring the internet. Venus IV and Captain Zoney Jones have, over the past
few years, been developing through discussions, debates, and uncharted expeditions into the realm of
the absurd, a blueprint for what they felt would someday be the 9th wonder of the world (Andre the
Giant is the 8th for those who were unaware), The Rat Lab.
How can you be aware of what you are doing in such a complicated mess? If I buy a burrito at Taco
Maximus, how can I know where that money is going? Why should I care? Well I suppose if I buy enough
burritos and I bring my friends to buy burritos, and they bring their friends, and so on. Eventually
there is a lot of money there. Now if Taco Maximus is contributing funds, or is a subsidiary of
L.C.O.W.A.O.T.L.G.P.F.F.T.B.O.T.A.A.W.R.C.O.A (Large Corporation Of Walking All Over The Little
Guys Personal Freedoms For The Benefit Of The Already Absurdly Wealthy Ruling Class Of America)
and they bust me for sharing files and use that burrito money to hire fancy lawyers to sue me and put
me in debt for the rest of my life, I am probably going to wish I ate less burritos.
I suppose I am starting to ramble but the point is...
It is sometimes a good thing to take a little time to educate yourself and be aware of what is happening
around you. The Rat Lab is not a politically motivated endeavor. What I would really like to accomplish
is to have a good source of interesting ideas, and useful information for the benefit of the pseudo
intellectual, proletariat, artist and musician types such as myself. The goal is to gather like-minded
individuals to contribute towards the spirit of the free flowing exchange of ideas that the internet
was originally intended for. Seems to me that it's now basically more of a giant billboard, or
advertisement designed to lure us commoners into giving up our table scraps for the big belly of big
business who's ever expanding fat cats push their weight around in the political forums to get laws
passed that serve their best interest. Unfortunately it is in their best interest to make the rest of
us into ultra domesticated consumers with a zero tolerance to propaganda and insatiable appetite for
material possessions.
Just turn on your t.v. It doesn't even matter what channel. This is the reality we live in.
Watch out, this is starting to sound manifesto-ish. By the time I get to version 8.0 we ought to be
smokin here. But for now I am getting sick of all the sermonizing. Honestly, I don't have any real
intentions on doing anything about any of this. Or at least not forcing anything down anybody's throat.
Education is a part time job for me. The more I learn the less I wish I knew seems to be the situation
a good part of the time. Often times I can't control my appetite for knowledge, which results in me
gorging, and getting sick, and throwing it all up. So the second theme of this website, and the one
that I enjoy the most, is the you can't take yourself too seriously part.
I don't really like the idea of sitting around acting important via the serious man's ways. The way I
see it, if you can let yourself see the hilarity all around you, you can see a form of beauty in an
otherwise mundane setting. The beauty of the absurd. Believe me when I tell you there is just as much
humour in the world as there is suffering. You just have to tap into it. And why not? If somebody slips
on a banana peel is it not better to laugh at them then to kick them while they're down.
I am rambling again.
One other reason for this manifesto was to help this page be search engine friendly, so I have to
include a lot of phrases that people might search for here, let's see...
Britney Spears, Janet Jackson's Breast, xxx, Paris Hilton, Atkins Diet, American Idol, Free, George
Foreman grill, Justin Timberlake, porn, mp3, warez, Perfect Strangers, sex, Biance Knowles, Celebrity
Survivor, Fabio, graphics, nude, outkast, Christina Aguilara, Orville Redenbacher, discofrantic
electromanetic boogiewoogiemaster of interplanetary proportions, The Rat Lab.
That ought to do it for now.
Keep an eye out for Rat Lab Manifesto ver 1.1.2
...coming soon.
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